When I was a kid, I loved diving. I spent every summer at a neighborhood pool club and practiced diving for hours. My favorite and best dive was the jack-knife. In order to execute properly on a jack-knife, you need a lot of height off the board so you have time while in the air to touch your toes and then reposition your body into a diving stance to enter the water.
The best jack-knifes were achieved with what was called a double bounce. Another kid would stand behind you on the diving board and mirror your steps. They needed to jump at exactly the same time as the diver in order to give the diver a great bounce and additional height for the dive. If the timing was off the diver would lose their footing and have a sub-par dive, or worse yet, just fall off the board. But when done correctly, the double bounce was amazing. It allowed you to experience weightlessness just a little bit longer and it was a wonderful ride. And this could only be achieved if there was someone behind you who was really atune to your diving style and steps…someone who had your back.
Once the dive was competed, it was the “bouncer’s job to critique the dive. And they were never expected to sugar coat their review. Every aspect of the dive was disected: was your alignment correct, were your toes pointed, were your movements jerky or smooth, was there too much splash upon entry into the water…all these points were considered and we welcomed the feedback because we really wanted to perfect our dives.
My best friend at the time was my diving buddy and the person who was always behind me on the double bounce. The fact that she was able to time her steps and jumps with mine so flawlessly still amazes me…she was a good seven inches taller than me and her diving style was quite different than mine. But she watched and listened and practiced and shared the same desire as me to succeed. And that’s what made it work.
I was reminded of my diving buddy recently while reading Keith Ferrazzi’s new book, “Who’s Got Your Back.” Keith recommends finding three people who will “have your back” and help you succeed professionally and personally. He reminds us that the best people to reach out to are those who we can expose our vulnerability to, expect candid feedback from, and trust to hold us accountable for following through on our plans and dreams. Frequently, the right person for the partnership is not our close friend or even a family member, because these people may be telling us what they think we want to hear rather than what we need to know.
Job seekers really need trusted advisers that they can be honest with and be accountable to. No one should be expected to go it alone and I recommend that all job seekers have a buddy to share tips and advice with and solicit feedback from. When I was on that diving board, there was a certain vulnerability; a certain blind spot…You can’t watch yourself diving in real time, so you need to rely on an observer to help you make the necessary corrections. The same can be said for job search. Sometimes a buddy can help you correct the blind spots you may have as a job seeker so you can go on to execute a more successful strategy.
Barbara,
I was touched… really. This is so sweet and so how I felt about you as well. It was generous of you to share with the world. I am honored to have been your diving buddy.
🙂 Cha
Thanks Cha! I’ve got your back…always!…but no double bounces on back dives…that would be called I’ll break your back!
Hi Barbara,
Very good, touching and right posting.
Loved it very much and shared it immediately with my consultees.
TY Barbara!
Meir